Sick Sick Sick

AND SO OVER IT.

It doesn't help that I have a virus which has resulted in me coughing (and vomiting) all night and day. In one hour tonight, I was sick 5 times.... it's just gross.

I had a scan yesterday.... it was mosly due to my anxiety and me being sick but also because I just needed to know that there are still two babies in there....

The scan was amazing. The woman was so lovely. I got all emotional (again) and she turned on a second screen so I could see everything she could. She kept saying "Oh they are just so cute" ~ I liked her instantly lol. Apparently twins are still a novelty there lol.

So here are the new bean shots...

Twin A ~ the smaller of the two thus far...

Twin B ~ which apparently looks like one of my friends (according to her LMAO).

Popped

I know the 'babies' are the size of a seed lol but even so, my stomach has popped out. It's due to all of the hormones I'm guessing because I've not gained weight yet (the vomiting has helped that) but it's hard to cover the new 'pot'.

In one way, I can't wait until it gets just that bit bigger because at the moment, I just look fat lol.

Apart from that, nothing much else is happening. I have been hit with morning sickness and it's not nice but I keep trying to tell myself it's all good. When I am sick, I wish I wasn't but then if I have a break from it, I worry because I'm not lol.

Aside from the sickness, all is good. Everybody is shocked and bar a few stupid comments, people have just been so supportive and excited for us.

8 more weeks and I'll know what they are.... I think I've decided to keep it a surprise though. Kara will hate me for it but it will add to the excitement :P xxx

Pram Shopping

lol.

I went to look at twin prams today ~ not with a view to buy one yet as it's way too early ~ but more to get an idea of cost. They're farking expensive lol.

I have chosen the one I want. I love it and it's exactly what I was looking for.

What I wanted was *something* that would enable me to have the babies in a car capsule. That way, with school drop offs and pick ups, shopping etc, I wouldn't have to wake the babies to move them ~ I could just take the capsule from car to pram and back again.

There's a pram called the City Select Stroller. It allows you to buy an extension to convert it to a double pram and then you have the option of using the standard seat that it comes with or clicking in car capsules. It's not cheap but then none of the twin ones were anyway and I think the little extra it will cost will be well worth the convenience. I just want to make everything as easy as possible.

I feel better today. Still totally overwhelmed but these babies have come into our lives for a reason. I feel so sick already and even though I'm only six weeks, my stomach is already starting to pop out. Apparently that's not uncommon and by 8-9 weeks, it will be difficult to cover.

So, Twin A and Twin B, I hope you're both growing happily in there. Even though I'm still in shock, you are both very very wanted xxx

Hard Day (Better Night)

I think reality came crashing down today.... in a big way. There were periods where I just couldn't stop crying and for the majority of them, I had no idea why. My head is just going from one thing to the next. It keeps coming back to one thing though ~ utter disbelief.

Part of me (a big part when I'm not crying) is so excited about 'twins'. I feel amazed that, all going well, I will experience this. That I will have two newborn babies in my arms in less than 7 months time.

Another part is terrified and that's where I was tonight. I just can't imagine two babies. Not on my own. I worry about how Kara's life will be altered. I worry about money. I worry I won't be able to be the mother I have been for Kara for these two babies.

I just cannot believe it.

I want these babies so badly. I really do. I'm just finding it so difficult to believe there are two inside me. That I will have three children.

Sue.... thank you so much for tonight. I'm still shaking my head but you are right ~ everything will be ok.

I hope.

OK. This Is Umm........

.....I'm still deciding what it is.

Look at the pics... note there are the words Twin A and Twin B.

I'm in shock.

xxxx

5 Weeks.....

So far so good. I've relaxed (a little bit) but am still anxious. Every day I wake up, I hope my boobs are still KILLING and that I feel sick. The sickness has worn off a lot but I'm trying not to let that worry me ~ I'm still really tired, have a huge appetite and my boobs are soooooo sore. Maybe I'll get through this pregancy without the sickness ~ that would be fab, as I suffered badly with Kara.

We have our first scan on Thursday :D. It was booked for the following thursday but when I called, the woman said they can find the heart beat at 6 weeks, so she moved me forward. I will feel much better when I see that (and when I see that there is only one!).

Kara is still very very excited. I keep reminding her that the 'baby' is still only cells 'just in case' but she's convinced they will turn into a baby .... I hope she's right!!!!

Something else exciting! It looks like we're going to Qld in July! I have booked our return flight lmao because it was really cheap..... now we just have to get there! I just really want to take Kara away before I get too big and fat :P Can't wait to meet you Tanya!!!!!! You can take Kara on all of the scary rides :P :P :P xxx

Woohoo

....... My baby girl is due to become a big sister.

I've decided to start a blog tracking the progress of my pregnancy.... not sure how successful it will be lol but I think it will be cool to look back on assuming everything goes to plan. It will also be a great place for me to share where I'm at.

At the moment, more than anything, I'm just feeling anxious. I hate this early phase ~ I constantly have a fear of losing the 'baby' and I just want to get to 12 weeks. Even then, I'm sure I'll stress and say I just want to be at 20 weeks..... I just want a healthy baby in my arms at the end of it lol.

So far, I feel exactly as I did with Kara. A constant hangover feel and over-sensitive smell.... I can't sleep and do about 5 pregnancy tests a week :P. I've tried to stop the latter..... I only have one left and am trying really hard not to use it lol.

At the same time though, I'm so excited. This baby is so very wanted. By me of course but also by Kara. Despite being so early in the pregnancy, I decided to tell her. I figured she needs to know why I'm feeling the way I am... I've explained to her that the pregnancy at this stage is only cells and that not all cells result in a baby... she understands that and after showing her some sites of the developing baby, she wants me to be 12 weeks too!! She has decided she doesn't care if she has a brother or sister now (she's always wanted a sister) ~ she just requested that if it is a boy, it be a quiet one. She's also asked that I buy a pram that has the handle at the front so she can see the baby when she's pushing it.... sooooo gorgeous!!!! I'm not worried about Kara adjusting at all.... not now.

So, at the moment, it's a waiting game. I have a scan in 2 weeks to check the heart beat and to make sure there's only one.

I am really looking forward to this journey.... I am so fortunate to have friends who are happy and excited to travel it with me too. I hope they know how much that means to me.

Oh ~ the title! The baby is due on 1-01-11... very cool :D xxx